Monday, October 8, 2012

In which I procrastinate

I'm sorry. I didn't mean to worry everyone. I am ok, just busy. I spend a lot of time at my work, and I've begun to go back to school. Just two classes, and one of them is a one credit study skills thing. but it's kept me preoccupied.

I am going to take a minute to gush about my job for a minute. Toy stores are so much better than resturaunts, they're less hectic and less people yell at you. I usually stay in the art supplies section, given that I don't know how I feel about being with children. Which means that I get to hang out with Norma a lot.

Norma's the mother of the owner Cassie. She's like seventy or something and reminds me a lot of Maude from Harold and Maude. We sometimes make up songs based off of people's purchases for the day. Sometimes we can get Cassie to join in, but mostly she just rolls her eyes. Not that she's a bad person. She totally isn't, and she's pretty much the best boss ever. Tough but in that totally reasonable kinda way. She's just very... serious. And there's a sadness to her that makes me want to hug her.

By now you're probably wondering why I'm spending time talking about my job and such, when the last time I posted I was all hunting down evil cults and so on. Well, I'm still doing that... it's just.

This is part of why I didn't post for so long. I didn't want to admit this. I already feel like I let people down, and telling the people who read my blog about it just adds more people to the list. But the urge to write has come again, and I couldn't go on without talking about what happened.

I was too late.

The school by my house burned down. sixteen children died, twenty-three injured. And I wasn't even doing anything important when it happened. I was asleep.

So now I'm at work, or at school, or looking for answers. I don't like sitting still, because then I think of those sixteen dead children I let down. And I really didn't want to come here and tell you all that story. I couldn't help them. And it's tearing me apart.

Even worse, I can't find Lazarus. At all. Which means that in many ways, my investigation is at a standstill. I don't know where Atropos will strike next, or if they're even in DC still. I'm just stumbling around in the dark.

So this is terrible, but I think that part of me just wanted to forget about it. Go on with my life, cut this as a loss and start actually doing things my remission allows me to do. But lately it's been bugging me. My dreams of being in the basement have become more frequent and more vivid. Except now the basement shifts to a school, and I watch tied to a chair as he comes for them.

So... I'm back. For better or for worse.